Had an interesting trip to the northwest. It was one of those vacations where you have some idea of the places you want to go, but the rest you just sorta wing it. Before we even got off the plane, my wife asked "Oh crap, I was supposed to ask you, did you want to pack some CD clothes?". I had to do a double take for a second, did she seriously just ask what I think she asked? She then went to explain that the town we were going to be in is very liberal, and nobody cares what you do. She also went on to say that it would have probably been a good opportunity because she knows I don't go out dressed now because of my fear of someone recognizing me (but it's also the fear of someone judging me, so double bonus opportunity). Had I known she even had thoughts of such a thing, I would probably have agreed to it.
Anyway, one of my wife's work centers was close by, and one of her co-workers just happens to be gay. The subject of cross dressing came up simply because of the liberal town we happen to be in. It almost sounded as if they had this conversation at some point because just before we went into a restaurant he sort of non-nonchalantly prodded me a little bit. If I remember right, he asked me if I did it because I appreciated the female visual so much that I wanted it wrapped around me, I agreed. Then he asked me if I had any interest in guys at all, which I replied no (which is mostly true, though a man dressed as a woman excites me, so I'm not sure how to categorize that). So we get our table, and we start looking at a menu. I then decide to pull up my "urnotalone" profile page and grab a couple photos of myself dressed up. I show them to him, he studies it for about half a minute, smiling, then starts nodding and says "wow, you really are pretty, you do that all yourself?", I say yes. Then my wife chimes in "Isn't he? I hate to admit it, but he does a pretty good job".
So not only did I come out to someone I just met, but I'm finding out things about my wife I didn't even realize. Not only does she want to see me live out my dream of going out in public as a girl (without it being Halloween), but she honestly thinks I'm pretty dressed up.
Then this odd feeling of guilt starts setting in. I feel the glow of the compliment, and realize how crappy my wife must feel because I never compliment her. Now I have to preface before I make the following comment. I am attracted to my wife, I love her, I don't cheat on her (we are completely open and honest in our relationship). But the fact is because I'm a crossdresser, I'm attracted to pretty clothes, sparkly jewelry, makeup, hair styling, high heels, dresses. My wife is almost none of those things, yet I can't say anything because I know she's not comfortable in any of that, and it would only offend her if I asked her to wear any of that. To top that off, she really likes men with facial hair, something I refuse to do being who I am. If I expected her to do any of that, I would have to reciprocate otherwise I would be expecting a double standard.
The trip ended with a layover in phoenix, where I saw a gorgeous woman waiting in the terminal. Now when I say gorgeous, I mean she was just brimming with femininity. At first glance, I honestly thought "stripper", but I kept looking. She looked to be latina, so she had the dark tan skin. She had long black straight hair with blonde streaks that looked like she just came out of the salon. She had beautiful shoes, long red nails, big thick red lips, and she had the most perfectly applied false eyelashes. These drew me in the most, because this is what made her the most feminine of all the attributes. Then it got me thinking, I really need to practice putting on lashes.
Anyway, one of my wife's work centers was close by, and one of her co-workers just happens to be gay. The subject of cross dressing came up simply because of the liberal town we happen to be in. It almost sounded as if they had this conversation at some point because just before we went into a restaurant he sort of non-nonchalantly prodded me a little bit. If I remember right, he asked me if I did it because I appreciated the female visual so much that I wanted it wrapped around me, I agreed. Then he asked me if I had any interest in guys at all, which I replied no (which is mostly true, though a man dressed as a woman excites me, so I'm not sure how to categorize that). So we get our table, and we start looking at a menu. I then decide to pull up my "urnotalone" profile page and grab a couple photos of myself dressed up. I show them to him, he studies it for about half a minute, smiling, then starts nodding and says "wow, you really are pretty, you do that all yourself?", I say yes. Then my wife chimes in "Isn't he? I hate to admit it, but he does a pretty good job".
So not only did I come out to someone I just met, but I'm finding out things about my wife I didn't even realize. Not only does she want to see me live out my dream of going out in public as a girl (without it being Halloween), but she honestly thinks I'm pretty dressed up.
Then this odd feeling of guilt starts setting in. I feel the glow of the compliment, and realize how crappy my wife must feel because I never compliment her. Now I have to preface before I make the following comment. I am attracted to my wife, I love her, I don't cheat on her (we are completely open and honest in our relationship). But the fact is because I'm a crossdresser, I'm attracted to pretty clothes, sparkly jewelry, makeup, hair styling, high heels, dresses. My wife is almost none of those things, yet I can't say anything because I know she's not comfortable in any of that, and it would only offend her if I asked her to wear any of that. To top that off, she really likes men with facial hair, something I refuse to do being who I am. If I expected her to do any of that, I would have to reciprocate otherwise I would be expecting a double standard.
The trip ended with a layover in phoenix, where I saw a gorgeous woman waiting in the terminal. Now when I say gorgeous, I mean she was just brimming with femininity. At first glance, I honestly thought "stripper", but I kept looking. She looked to be latina, so she had the dark tan skin. She had long black straight hair with blonde streaks that looked like she just came out of the salon. She had beautiful shoes, long red nails, big thick red lips, and she had the most perfectly applied false eyelashes. These drew me in the most, because this is what made her the most feminine of all the attributes. Then it got me thinking, I really need to practice putting on lashes.
