Monday, July 15, 2019

What a weekend, taking baby steps!

So this past friday I got home early as usual.  My wife works from home, but she wasn't going to be done with work for a couple hours.  So I decided to dress up since it was the weekend.  I wore that sunflower top I got from rosegal, a pair of my black lacey pants, my new sandals, wig, earrings, short french manicured false nails..  I felt really good, feeling feminine without being over the top (dress, heels, the usual drill).  I actually had some good cleavage too, like passable.  Wife comes down, sort of surprised to see me dressed up.  She goes "I guess we aren't going to dinner", and I'm like "Why, were you planning on going out?".  To preface that statement, we rarely go out to dinner.  Not because I'm a bad husband, because she doesn't typically enjoy going out.  The times we do "eat out" it's usually me picking it up on the way home, or ordering out.  I half jokingly said "I look pretty good right now, don't tempt me".  she asked "Do you want to?", to which of course I said no.. But felt good knowing she would be ok going out in public with me dressed up.

So after behaving and eating healthy all week, we decided to have a cheat night.  We ordered from a chain fish place through uber eats.  Now I'm still dressed, so of course she asked "Do I need to answer the door?", and I go no.  She's like "are you sure?", and I say yes.  Uber driver comes to the door, it's a spanish looking woman maybe in her mid 30's?  I say "thank you" in the softest voice I can.  I always try to read their face to see if I can read their reaction.  She didn't seem to flinch, not to say she isn't questioning why this giant woman is answering the door.

So then the next morning comes, and my wife decides she wants bbq from the ribfest going on a few blocks away.  I'm no longer dressed but still have my short french nails on.  I drive down, park the car, and walk in not really caring that much if people see my nails.  It's early in the day so there aren't a ton of people either.

Saturday night rolls around, I've had several nails pops off.  For whatever reason, sometimes the shorter nails have more issues than the longer ones.  I believe the curve on the short ones don't match my nails, and therefore there's always a force trying to pry them away.  Lot of people that review nail adhesive on amazon have mixed reviews, and it's because all of them are using different nails.  After I put the longer ones on, I could feel how strong they felt.

Next morning I had to drive her to the airport, long frilly nails still holding strong.  I'm helping get bags out of the back, everyone clearly busy also dropping off family.  I head towards home knowing I'm low on gas.  I stop at a gas station, still nobody looking at my nails.  I stop at an automatic car wash, no weird looks from the attendant.  I stop at the grocery store, grab about 5-6 items, reaching for stuff on shelves, many housewives shopping early in the morning, no weird looks or comments.  I do use self checkout but sort of wishing I had used a human checkout person.

So after reflecting on this past weekend, I'm really feeling that if I continue to take baby steps I can build up my confidence to go out dressed up.  Might start with a car ride, maybe a drive through.. see where it goes from there.

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